Interview with Crashie

Sozzals
Today I’m here with Crashie, one of our younger members – and perhaps one of our biggest enigmas. Crashie is one of the few people who spams discord so much, we had to end up giving him his own channel. I plan on finding out what makes Crashie tick and what kind of shit he likes.

So Crashie, tell us how you first became involved in video games. Whats your earliest memory of playing games?

culacant
In middle school, before we had computers at home we sometimes went to pick up my dad from work
and he had internet there so we played flash games on his computers
i remember something about conways game of life being somewhere and me thinking i could control the blips but idk where or when that was

Sozzals
So you eventually got a PC at home. Assuming you took control of it immediately?

culacant
My dad actually bought one of the first mini macs that came out
the trouble with macs is that there are very few games for it and it is total shit
eventually i got the original star wars battlefront for it, but never figured out how to play online
my very first own pc was a piece of shit from 1999, with a pentium 3 in it
this was followed by a string of dissapointments when i put in games from 2004+ in

Sozzals
What was your first MMORPG then?

culacant
Runescape ofcourse
we didnt have internet for the longest time though, so I had to go to the library to play it
until the lady at the library found out everyone went there to play runescape and she put a stop to it

Sozzals
Must have been hard maintaining online relationships when playing from a library – assuming you couldn’t join voicechat or anything?

culacant
at that time everyone on runescape was 12 yrs old so i doubt anyone had voicechat
i know i hung out with some friends from school and my nephew, who was a total nerd and gave me mithril armor

Sozzals
Was your very first online name “Culacant”? or something else? How did you choose this name and tell everyone who doesn’t know you how you ended up being called Crashie?

culacant
Culacant comes from Coelacanth, which is a fish that hasnt evolved for a couple million years
i think i misspelled it the first time and it stuck
now crashadin comes from wow, when I decided tto make a paladin
i spent 10 minutes picking the right beard for this guy, and i was thinking of a name when wow crashed and i had to start all over
so i stuck with crashadin

Sozzals
haha 😀 also +1 for misspelled unevolved fish
How did you end up joining Pyran? What do you remember about your initiation?

culacant
I remember coming back to excalibur to a guild that was dead as doornails
so i start looking around for a new guild
enter pyran, however between me making my application and you reading it, i decided i wanted to go on vacation for 6 months, so i was like “can yall carry me through T5 so i can afk for half a year”
and somehow you said yes
i have still not forgiven yall for breaking the excal guild while i was gone

Sozzals
I think guilds on private servers have a limited lifespan before everyone gets bored or pissed off at doing the same content week after week

culacant
pugs come and go, but pyran lasts forever

Sozzals
Exactly. We’ve been here probably as long as you’ve been alive.
Some people don’t know this – but Crashie ended up being Pyran’s longest trial. Do you remember how this happened?

culacant
i think i got to member but then someone got mad and jim demoted me
right?

Sozzals
yeah you got put in the naughty corner for a while

culacant
good times

Sozzals
What is it, about you, that pisses some people off?

culacant
im not rightly sure
I tried being pissed off once but i didnt like it so i decided i wouldnt do it again

Sozzals
So you’re just misunderstood?

culacant
if i had to guess tho, it is a culmination of jealousy of my devilish good looks, happy go lucky attitude even when theres nothing to go happy be lucky about and a level of humor so far above everyone elses head that they think im serious
i would say that i am misunderstood yes

Sozzals
Are you REALLY a Trump fan or is this just an act to piss off the lefties?

culacant
i wouldnt say im fan, but i do really support some of his policies

Sozzals
fair enough, everyone is entitled to their opinions!
Tell us about your relationship with Texas. How does someone from Belgium end up with a Texan accent?

culacant
all aboard the crazy train
so i dropped out of college once
and i didnt know what to do, so i got drunk one night and decided to go to texas
i packed a backpack full of camping stuff and got a plane, and i ended up staying there for 6 months

Sozzals
Did you know anyone there before you went over?

culacant
there was one guy that i played wow with, i hung out with him for a week and helped him move.

Sozzals 
What did you do for six months in Texas? What happened to you over there?

culacant
i just travelled around
i got involved in a baptist church for a while, went camping for a couple months on end and took a canoe downriver for another month
and i shot guns and rode horses ofc

Sozzals
Did the experience change you in any way?

culacant
well as you said before i now have a completely unintelligible accent

Sozzals
You’re studying now right? Tell us how that’s going and what you want to be when you grow up.

culacant
Yes I am in college studying IT, apart from the horrible mess that is web design i am really enjoying it
my current goal in life is to get that degree so I can make tons of money and marry a rich texan lady

Sozzals
That’s good goal. Tell us what games you’re playing at the moment.

culacant
right now I am on and off on the dalaran wow server, although more off than on
other than that I have been playing in the necromunda campaign on tabletop sim with pyran
I have been looking for a good coop game to play, but i havent found something suitable yet
ARE WE DONE

Sozzals
Didn’t you just buy Nine Parchments yesterday?!
And yes, thanks for your time Mr. Crashie. Any last words?

culacant
play nine parchments with me?
or failing that, the disney pirate game i gave you like 5 years ago